- everything that happens will happen today
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house_monkey- February 11th, 20:52
"Oh take off those stupid pants!" a man shouts at me from a passing car. The saucy devil, he didn't even offer to buy me a drink first.
- Have they invented the hovercar yet?
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- house_monkey
- October 17th, 2008
Reporting from the mean streets once more.
Mum: Don't get shitty.
Son: I aren't shitty. You're shitty, you are. Don't say shitty to me.
- Now that I've located D batteries, the universe will be mine
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- house_monkey
- August 22nd, 2008
Overheard words
- in a bookshop:
"I'm going through a cupcake stage and it's beautiful."
- walking past a cafe:
"Just in her underwear with a cowboy hat on."
- Less planning, more blundering
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- house_monkey
- March 14th, 2008
Overheard radio conversation between bus driver and dispatcher:
Driver: I've got a bird in my bus. Instructions?
Dispatcher: What kind of bird?
Driver: One with wings and it's flying around.
- Come on, son, let's go play in the toilet!
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- house_monkey
- July 12th, 2007
Overheard on the street:
"How was he not gay? He came in my mouth several times over a two week period!"
- Weren't there two of those?
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- house_monkey
- April 23rd, 2007
Overheard in a cafe queue today:
"I'm hungry and thirsty. And what I want I get, you fucker."
Was I in line with a Hollywood superstar perhaps? No, the speaker was a girl, three or four years old at most. Bad parenting I hear you say, but she enunciated beautifully.
- Yes it's different, I've never locked anybody in before
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- house_monkey
- September 28th, 2006
Overheard conversation today:
Man: What do you want to be, are you going to work, or...?
Boy: I want to be just like you!
Man: Fuck off! 118 convictions, cut that shit out.
