house_monkey

Recently I was lucky enough to share lunch with a few members of the Indian cricket team. They were nice guys. Except Yuvraj Singh, who's a cock.
( My lunch with Mahendra )

Happy Independence Day, India!

p.s. Your middle order's looking a bit creaky these days, might want to see to that.

The best name in cricket.

And in county cricket, Shane Bond takes 7-66 bowling for Hampshire. Waaah!

Courtesy of cricinfo, stories of cricketers and crime:

Leslie Hylton:
Leslie Hylton, who played half-a-dozen Tests for West Indies immediately before the war, holds a unique if grisly place in cricket history as the only Test cricketer to be executed. Hylton was hanged in Jamaica on May 17, 1955 after being found guilty of murdering his wife the previous year after she had confessed to adultery. Hylton told the court that he was attempting to shoot himself but had missed, an argument rather undermined when it emerged he had fired seven bullets into his wife, meaning he had to pause to reload his gun. Wisden, steadfastly skirting round anything remotely sordid even as late as the 1950s, managed to produce an obituary without mentioning the small detail that he had been executed for murder.
Ian Botham:
Ian Botham's time with Queensland ended under a cloud when he was arrested by Perth police after an incident on a domestic flight when a passenger objected to some ripe language being used by Botham and his state team-mates. Botham took the man's head, turned it to the front and told him it had "**** all to do with you". At the station, the officer asked Botham to sign a bat before charging him. In the end, Botham was bailed by Dennis Lillee who turned up with a six-pack and his 12-year-old son (who told his father he "wanted to be able to tell his mates he'd seen Botham behind bars") Botham pleaded guilty, was fined £400 and soon after the Queensland board decided to terminate his contract.

Best cricket story ever:
Village cricketer has heart attack while batting but stays on in attempt to get 50

For those who care, the lunatics have taken over the asylum.

Cricket is not an easy game to start liking. It is a complex and baffling game. It demands utter devotion, infinite patience, certain intellectual engagement and that utterly scarce commodity: time, lots of it. Also, the cricket lover, particularly those attracted to the alluring charms of Test cricket, must be prepared to enjoy the journey for the sake of it, without obsessing about the destination. Try convincing your American friend that a drawn Test is not a waste of five days.

Indeed.
Full article here.

And I thought Warnakulasuriya Patabendige Ushantha Joseph Chaminda Vaas was bad enough, try getting your mouth around Amunugama Rajapakse Rajakaruna Abeykoon Panditha Wasalamudiyanse Ralahamilage Rajitha Krishantha Bandara Amunugama, the man with quite probably the longest name ever in first class cricket.

Best comment from the game of nude beach cricket held last week in Australia to commemorate Anzac Day: "The only problem is I don't have anywhere to pin my father's medals."

Ricky Ponting is probably not very happy right now.

As a follower of cricket in New Zealand I can quite easily accept that there will be periods, often quite extended, when the national side aren't as competitive as we would like them to be. But it must be frustrating being an Indian supporter, a population of about one billion and they still can't produce a team capable of performing consistently. Then again, a significant chunk of the populace probably have more pressing issues on their mind than the form of Sachin Tendulkar.

Cricketers usually have pretty boring nicknames, utility generally trumping imagination, Matthew Hayden is simply "Haydo", Adam Gilchrist "Gilly" and Stephen Fleming the rather unpleasant sounding "Flem." Aussie captain Ricky Ponting fares a little better wih "Punter", but occasionally you get some real gems: Mike Hussey goes by "Shameless", my personal favourite, while NSW player Aaron Bird is apparently known to his teammates as "Flu."

In India, when a popular player is dropped from the national team it gets discussed in Parliament.

They did it, they actually fucking did it. Outstanding. Did I mention I went to school with Scott Styris?

On my way to work this morning I stopped to help a random stranger move some stuff out of her flat. Only it turns out that she knows several people I am also acquainted with, including someone in the flat she is moving out of. Sometimes this city is very small. I should have asked what her livejournal username is.

Daniel Vettori has retained the captaincy for the third one-day match against Australia today, even though Stephen Fleming has returned to the team after surgery. While this is no doubt simply to maintain series continuity, this wouldn't exacly be a bad time to break in a new captain either, allowing Fleming to concentrate on his batting.

Now that our first season of Ultimate is over, I wonder if our gravity defying captain repton_infinity will be issuing report cards for each of us? I for one would not be entirely confident of a passing grade.

In India, even cartoon characters play cricket.

It's no laughing matter in Bangladesh either, as more than 200 are injured in clashes over umpiring.

Cricket in Zimbabwe is a serious business. First Tatenda Taibu, the national captain, resigned after receiving death threats and now it seems that both the managing director and chairman of Zimbabwe Cricket have disappeared.

Update: Turns out this may not have happened after all, both are saying they are fine and still in charge, which is a shame because those two are bad news.

During a conversation today with mashugenah he said, "Whoever thought that was a good idea?" in reference to how the ball is bowled in cricket. I couldn't remember his name at the time and there are some conflicting accounts of how it all began but it turns most people didn't think it was a good idea initially. It was feared that bowling overarm or "round-arm" would give too much advantage to the bowler. Originally bowlers rolled the ball along the ground (as happened during that famous game in 1981 between New Zealand and Australia which has become part of our sporting folklore) before the idea of pitching or lobbing the ball underarm, allowing variations in length and direction, was devised sometime around the 1740s.
The following piece is from an article by M. Shoaib Ahmed on Cricinfo.

By 1773 length bowling had replaced true bowling. It soon led to further experiments. In the 1780s Thomas Walker of Hambledon tried out a form of round-arm delivery but was specifically warned against it. Gradually others tried to bowl it and in 1816 a law was introduced to prohibit it:

'The ball must he howled (not thrown or jerked), and be delivered underhand, with the hand below the elbow. But if the ball be jerked, or the arm extended from the body horizontally, and any part of the hand be uppermost, or the hand horizontally extended when the ball is delivered, the Umpires shall call "No Ball".'

Opponents of round-arm bowling feared that it would restrict scoring and lead to an imbalance in favour of the bowler. Statistics proved them right. The first exponent of round-arm bowling was probably John Willes of Kent. He used to practice batting against the bowling of his sister, Christina. Because of her full skirt she could only deliver the ball round-arm and Willes found it very difficult to play. When he opened the bowling round-arm for Kent against the MCC at Lord's on July 15, 1822, he became the first bowler in the game's history to be no-balled for throwing.

By 1827 many players had tried out the round-arm method and the Sussex pair, William Lillywhite and James Broadbridge, had perfected it. Three experimental matches that season between Sussex and England, in which the effect on scoring was studied, led to the MCC authorising round-arm bowling the following year. Bowlers were allowed to raise their hand level with their elbow. The change was incorporated into a revision of the laws in 1835 but with 'shoulder' replacing 'elbow'. Some were already experimenting with overarm bowling and it was frequently employed in matches when the umpires allowed, Edgar Willsher of Kent was the first to be no-balled for bowling overarm, by John Lillywhite at The Oval on August 26, 1862. Opening England's bowling against Surrey, he was called six times and the England team left the field causing play to be abandoned for the rest of the day. Lillywhite refused to change his mind and he was replaced as umpire for the final day. Thus reprieved, Willsher took 6 for 49.

Overarm bowling was legalized when an amendment to the Laws was passed on 10 June 1864. It did not lead to a wholesale overnight change in bowling actions. Most raised their arm to shoulder height. The 1878 Australians were the first team to employ a specialist overarm attack and another decade was to pass before the new style became prevalent.

There's also this, from Cricinfo's profile of John Willes:

John Willes is credited with being the first man to bowl round-arm in a first-class match - it was referred to as "straight arm" in contemporary reports - and on July 15, 1822 he was no-balled playing for Kent against MCC at Lord's. He famously threw down the ball in disgust, mounted his horse, and rode out the game forever. But "Silver Billy" Beldham insisted that Willis had not invented the style, merely "revived what was forgotten or new to the young folk" and that "jerking" as it was previously known had plagued cricket in the 1780s until outlawed by the Hambledon club.

Legend has it that Willes was inspired to develop a round-arm style after his sister used it, being prevented from bowling underarm by the voluminous skirts of the time. That is probably myth, but what is certain is that Willes was a colourful character. He kept his own pack of dwarf hounds, and on one occasion barricaded himself in his house against creditors, surviving on food passed to him by friends by means of a basket lowered from a window each night.

So now you know.

Coincidence. At last night's Serenity screening we were in cinema 2 and I sat in H14. Tonight I went to see The Curse of the Were-Rabbit and got given the same seat.

Still low, may take tomorrow off.

The Australian test and one-day squads for the Super Series have been announced. Gillespie and Kasprowicz gone. Martyn dropped from the test team, Hayden from the one-day team. A couple of others will no doubt be looking over their shoulders after this.

The Ashes are over, England has won, 2-1 just as selector David Graveney predicted (you have to admire his confidence), and much of what I said beforehand was off target. Clearly, a career in cricket journalism is not an option for me. But I was right about a few things. Paul Collingwood proved completely unnecessary for example, largely because Andy Flintoff decided he was going to beat the Aussies on his own, then Kevin Pietersen realised he'd played nearly 5 tests and still hadn't managed a 100 so set about rectifying this oversight. Glenn McGrath, in tandem with Shane Warne, almost dragged Australia over the finish line, but I suspect he wasn't fully fit, despite his claims to the contrary.
Here then, is my analysis of the Australian team, the first to lose the Ashes in 18 years.
( Aging Aussies Anticipating Axe? )

Oh no, it can't finish that way.

The fifth Ashes test starts tonight.
I expect an improved performance from the Australians this time around, the pressure's back on them after losing last time. But England are also under pressure, the English fans will expect a victory and this is a position they're not used to.
Glenn McGrath is playing and, if actually fully fit, could be the difference between the two sides. England have lost Simon Jones which could prove crucial to their chances. Paul Collingwood is a tough player, but selecting him to give added batting depth would be a defensive move that suggests England don't have the confidence in themselves to beat the Aussies one more time. I wouldn't pick him and Giles in the same side, it weakens the bowling strike power too much. Maybe it's time for a gamble, leave out Giles, pick both Collingwood and James Anderson and rely on Collingwod's medium pacers to tie up an end if needed. I can't see it happening though.
The Australian team balance is also a worry, especially with fewer players to call on. Hayden could well be gone, but perhaps not until after the series is over, they might give him one last go. I wouldn't want to, but there are no other specialist opening options there. I guess the Aussie selectors thought Langer and Hayden were invincible and din't feel the need to bring anyone else. Playing an all rounder is an option, nobody really cares if it looks like they're copying England, but I don't know if Shane Watson is really the man for the job mentally.
Win or lose, I think a few Australian international careers might have come to an end.

Spammers must be trying to tell me something. Every day I get email for hardcore porn and viagra.

What a bunch of whingers the Aussie cricketers are becoming now the pressure's on.

So, naturally, as soon as I decide to back Australia McGrath gets injured, Flintoff plays out of his skin to more than justify his selection at 6 and Australia lose the match by the closest margin in Ashes history. What a pack of drongoes.

Paul Collingwood added to England squad for second Test. I am so smrt.

The Black Caps have left for Zimbabwe. I sent my gear back last week and have heard nothing from either the bank or Wellfit, but a reply now would be rather redundant.
Oh well, at least the Ashes are on, looks like I'm becoming an Australian supporter for the timebeing. Glenn McGrath is a legend.

So, apart from a brief spell kill on the first day, normal transmission has been restored with Australia walloping England blood inside four days. Kevin Pietersen provided death them some resistance with the bat but couldn't quite get his kill them name up on the board at Lord's, due largely to a lack of support from his teammates. Steve Harmison made the early kill them all running with his fiery bowling but Glenn McGrath, the seemingly ageless metronome, soon turned the tide back Australia's way to collect his third man of the match award from as many tests at the home of kill them now cricket. Of course, there's no reason why England can't come back from this defeat. Several of Australia's top order failed to fire (although Ponting, I feel, is only an innings or two away from a big score) and Gillespie still hasn't rediscovered his accuracy. But the main kill obstacle to England's success is attitude, they're so used to losing to Australia by now they just can't seem to stop themselves losing the plot, even when they're in a good position as they were at tea kill on the first day. I don't see the English selectors making any changes yet, but I think a revised batting order is called for. Their bowling attack is blood death kill certainly up to scratch with four quality pacemen, so I'd get rid of Giles and move Flintoff down to 8. However, a decent replacement at 6 doesn't immediately spring to mind, especially with Thorpe resolute about being retired. Paul Collingwood's name has been suggested but, never say die player that he is and kill them all a better batsman than his first-class average (32.24) suggests (he does also offer an extra bowling option along with some much needed electric fielding ability), I'm not sure he really offers more as a batsman than Flintoff. In the Australian camp, I'd be tempted to give new fast bowler Shaun Tait a run at some point in the series, especially if neither Gillespie or Kasprowicz improve.
Update: Overnight Paul Collingwood scored an unbeaten 181 for Durham against Somerset.

Stupid rain.

( Ouch )

Jiminy Jillikers, Radioactive Man, Australia in trouble at 87/5! But the wicket of Clarke brings Gilchrist out to bat. I wish I could be watching this.

Less than 24 hours now until the talking stops and the real contest begins. What am I talking about? The Ashes, of course, hotly contested between Australia and England since 1882. England have not won since 1986-87. Will Kevin Pietersen be England's new saviour or a damp squib? Is Shane Warne past it? Can Michael Vaughan recapture the glorious form he displayed in 2003? If Ian Bell does well, will anyone even notice? Is Ricky Ponting really the best man to lead Australia? Who will prove the more incisive bowler, Steve Harmison or Glenn McGrath? Can Matthew Hayden find form? Jason Gillespie or Michael Kasprowicz? Will Andy Flintoff live up to the hype? Do England really have a chance this time?

Well, it took me a couple of days to get off my arse, then I agonized over what I wanted to say, but I did get those letters to Wellfit and The National Bank written. I wonder how much longer it wil be before I get a response, if any? Of course, I'm under no illusions whatsoever about how effective the letters will be. I'm going to have get some packagaing to send back all my assorted NZ Cricket gear. That's nine T-shirts, plus my replica ODI shirt and beloved white hat.
I'm gonna need a new hat.

Do not let that happen again, under any circumstances.

So much for the new server, what is up with Central now?

I didn't get to the zoo, nor did I acquire any trousers. Damn.

The young Asian woman who drives the cable car is incredibly hot. Damn.

With the recent ruckus over the Black Caps tour to Zimbabwe I will be emailing their various sponsors to express my disapproval of their support for it. Given that I own several items of apparel made by Wellfit, the team's official clothing supplier, I am prepared to send back everything I've bought from them if they are unwilling to change their position. Of course, this means I'll definitely be sending it and won't really achieve anything, but I feel I should do something (unless lots of other people do it too). Now if only I could afford to change banks too. When the tour does go ahead, as it almost inevitably will, I'm going to avoid any coverage of it.

Losing four games in a row has the Aussies so spooked they're seeing ghosts.

I think I'm broken.